Posts

Social Media

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I've concluded...some days I really don't like social media.There...I said it out loud!!!It already makes me feel better just saying this.It makes my beyond frustrated.I mean, like I have cried, had anxiety attacks and been super frustrated over some things related to this social scene.I admit it.I recently tried two IG Loop Giveaways and it was horrible....and all for getting LIKES!Seriously this stuff is nuts.

I guess this whole social media scene makes me truly understand how anti-social many people really are.I've done all the things you are "supposed" to do...use the right hashtags, the right words, the right filters for pics, the honesty, the vulnerability...being real and being me.I have done everything to be honest and to reach real people but I am finding it's way too much work for the results.And so, it would seem, this world may not be good for me.I hate the sense of competition.I hate that I feel I don't compare.That for some reason, if my phot…

Business and Burdens

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Today is one of those days when life has come crashing in all around me.I feel myself sinking beneath the load of frustration, stress and disappointment. I can't win at life from the popularity contest standpoint.For me, I have never been able to break that barrier and it has not really bothered me.Every once in a while, though, I feel the desire to soar and to be the one people talk good about.I'd like to have the world see me for who I am and even more I'd love for every person I know to wear a piece of our jewelry. I'd like the words I write and the pictures I post to get tons of likes...seriously, why else do it, right?!I often don't get the response that I seek and some times it gets the best of me and sends me into a bit of a tizzy.And...if you are honest, you might feel the same way too.Here we are just trying to stand out and make our place in the world.It can be so frustrating!
Hey, I am just being honest.Iengage to be engaged.I reach out to build a new con…

Loving the Life God Gave Us

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Godliness with contentment is great gain. (I Timothy 6:6)In other words, the highest, most honorable gain, in this life time, is found in the pursuit of being content with being God-like.Do that and you are a success in God's eyes.Sadly, the messages of contemporary culture, both Christian and secular, are often anything but spiritual.Being successful is defined by all the trappings that come with material pursuits, how fat your bank account is, and who calls you friend.All these things have become synonymous with success and the pursuit of them is tantamount to everything else.Popular cultures often confuses and intertwines these two, but they dare not be joined.The challenge is to live in today's culture without being sucked into this mindset.This has been doubly challenging for Glen and me.It's much easier said than done with mental illness on board and here's why.
Society values performance and perfection over principle, and charisma over character.I know why!Happy …

The Unwelcomed Visitor

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He came without an invitation.He had been lurking in the shadows for days.I'd get a glimpse of his face now and then, and wonder why he was hanging around.Often he would retreated to the shadows, I'd breathe a momentary sigh of relief, still wondering when he would make his presence fully known. Today, he finally came and entered without hesitation or warning.I had tried to bolt the door shut, but he managed to push past me.His dreary presence was uncomfortable, his disposition gloomy.He sidled next to me and whispered his intent.My soul shuddered!Not again, "I whispered!"It made no difference.He was here and I had to abide his stay no matter how long the visit. It wasn't a choice I made that beckoned him to come.I had not invited him, nor was I desirous of his visitation.He just came like he always does.He sneaks up on us, often finally making an entrance when least expected.I pondered why and contemplated his persistence.He is relentless.How long would he stay th…

Being Alive is Enough

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It has to beacceptable that I'm alive.  Is that not reason to celebrate?  No accomplishments need be attached to it.  One can see the similarities between a salvation which needs not one singular prop and the essence of existing, not striving to substantiate your being alive, you just are.

People move in and out of ages as a routine of living.  Some milestones are achieved and reached with a yawn or pedestrian agenda.  This is not to project a stereotype on humanity.  A simple turning of the head while stepping into the world, reminds us that most do not live surrounded by beds of roses.  There are those who claw and scrape their way through the desert of survival; not one day, not for a season, but for their entire existence.  The honest yet brutal recognition inundates them with the need for endless energy reserves and emotional tanks which presumably never run dry....but they do.  The older you become, the more daunting the journey.  The energy and time you devoted in the beginn…

Nothing Surprises God

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Nothing which touches my life is a surprise to God!God does not get blindsided.

God never becomes overwhelmed!Yet he empathizes with those who do. He doesn't judge or add pressure- He is simply God - always available.
God never becomes depressed, yet he holds the hand of the soul who clings to hope like grains of sand slipping through their fingers.
God never becomes psychotic or hears voices, yet He's waiting as the creator spirit hovers over those troubled souls.The compassionate Savior receives the returning one from the gray fog of a mental trance.
God never becomes anxious, yet He is there pacing back and forth as sweaty hands wring themselves together.....silently pleading for an end to this frenetic feeling.
God never is dyslexic, yet He understands the embarrassment which accompanies confusing moments and dis-organization.
God never becomes Suicidal, yet He sheds unmeasured hot tears for those who grapple with P.T.S.D.
God never becomes calloused or indifferent toward…

Kayaking and the Mental Health Survivor

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Thoughts of life are careening around inside my head like calving ice bergs with one piece breaking off and plummeting into the already floating mass.The laborious task of moving with the ebb and flow of life's current is wearisome.In the agonizing seasons, the will to survive grudgingly gives passage to thriving as more energy is invested to maintain that middle ground in order to not fall into depression.This hand to hand combat, within the mind, is as exhausting as flailing against a #10 whitewater with its roiling river current of foamy white power.The most experienced kayaker may lose thebattle with this watery jaw of death.You can picture the desperate scenario of the kayaker lying onthe river stones, chest and lungs heaving as the next breath is sucked in.In a moment like this, it is doubtful the kayaker is thinking about the next river challenge.No, rather a resolve to complete this challenge..... gather emotions and harness physical energy to move forward.In so many ways…